Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
her facebook pictures are like a timeline of all the guys she's screwed.
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I found her in the trunk, smoking a cigarette, saying every girl should know how to get out of their trunk
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
She took all the bottles out of the shower caddy and replaced them with booze. I just made a shower Manhatten. Imma marry this one.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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