Dude, she had a vegina. I felt like Indiana Jones cutting a path through the jungle.
so...dinner was kid's cuisine and a bottle of wine. i think they go well together.
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
Agreed. Everyone should experience a blackout before 3pm in their lifetime.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
U were yelling that I wasn't generous or supportive. Then you kneeled and said this weird prayer about the windows and doors of your life.
And your cousins porn shouldn't have been the first straight porn you watched. And for that I am sorry
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Tony's mom to him at breakfast: "I found the shirt you wore last night in the bushes this morning."
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Remember that St. Patrick's Day when I fucked your married coworker in his truck and the whole bar was chanting for you "Don't fuck Mike"?! #TheLuckOfTheIrish 🍀
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