does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
I just got a mental picture of us having sex in a trash can.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I hear sloppy seconds go great with fried rice
Before we rave about the healing powers of your penis, remember it nearly killed me as well.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I don't remember how I broke my nose last night, but I woke up with dried blood everywhere. Also, you should tell that guy how you feel.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Did you clean my apartment?
I thought it was a dream, I'm sorry
Please stay more often
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