I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
just saw the guy i hooked up with last nights' face on a billboard. win.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
you just knocked on the window of the ambulance and waved at me as we drove away
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
I met a bunch of Germans and said in german "this is for the fatherland" and poured a beer on my head
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I'm eating go-gurt and drinking beer alone in the dark. This is why you shouldn't marry young.
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Will exercising make me less horny?
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