You American Chicks are so confusing....1 day you are on my nuts next day you be trippin
Dude its not just American chicks...a small penis is the same in every language
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Only you can make me eat tacos in your car, while naked, on a dead end road in a ditch on a Thursday night.
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
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