how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
her body is proportioned like a family guy character
Why did I just get a ziplock baggie labeled "2010" on it from you in the mail?
Ok I'm good with that cause I'm gonna disappear for 90 days
Are you goin to rehab again?
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Threw up on break at work. That brings our collective tally to 9 times. We can never drink like that on a monday again
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
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