We stole some shitttt from king sooper's. fuck yeaaa
what did you steal
frozen pizza, cat litter, and preperation H. not much different than my usual grocery list.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
she won't be coming home tonight because she tried stealing a baby giraffe from the zoo
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
YOU BROUGHT HANDCUFFS TO THE WHITE ELEPHANT EXCHANGE AND DIDN'T TELL ME???
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I just loudly threatened to kill a self checkout machine
Is there a sexuality term for 'only wants hatefucks'?
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