I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
I've got my laundry in the car, tonights 1 night stand pre-req is an in suite washer and dryer. Let's do this!
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Why is there broken glass in my purse?
You stole a snow globe. From your VP. Soooo...maybe don't put all your hopes on that promotion you were expecting
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
My coworker's brand new computer showed up today. He's on vacation for the next week. Brian and I are installing Windows 98 on it.
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
The last time the Patriots won the Super Bowl I lost my virginity. I can only imagine what'll happen if they win this year.
I made him leave to get me chicken nuggets so I could have sex with his roommate
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
Drunk on wine at my parents house watching "RugRats In Paris". Comeatmeadulthood.
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