Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Oh damn. God have mercy on everything w a dick in a ten mile radius.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
It started out as friends with benefits and now I'm picking up her kids from daycare...what has happened to me
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Good point.
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Sex in a hot air balloon, top that one!
color coded lube a great way to organize my bootie calls
Randomize
