sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
dude.. you lit a cigarette on the bus and told the driver it was okay because you were fire marshall of your boy scout troop
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
So I managed to get the bitch who has been copying off me all semester in History to copy the names of Pokemon towns off my test.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
Can she stop putting up all these passive aggressive statuses and please come out of the "I-want-to-be-a-pornstar" closet already?
You know it's time to cut back when your unemployed drug dealer roommate tells you that you party too hard.
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
