Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
He ended up letting us go, I think he just felt sorry for us. It's the only time that my night's gotten worse after I've taken my pants off.
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
Also I think I set a new personal record. Definitely slept with him less than 45 minutes after meeting him. Oh god my life.
Randomize
