Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
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She keeps referring to it as an "us" Either she is seriously mistaken on what fuck buddies are or she learned another meaning of the word "us"
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
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My therapist keeps stopping to ask what 'hooking up' means
ITS ORAL SEX CAROL
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
I have already put on my inside pants.