I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Stop it. You sound like you're giving birth.
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
Baconater + red wine = first meal of the day
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I don't care how hot he got, I can't get past the PTSD flashbacks of the first time he fingered me
fat chick, vomit on the dog, and three unidentifiable pills in my ear. all in the same ear. what the hell happened after the guests showed up?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
His dick is as big as my 7" heels... Awkwardness is forgotten.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
After an hour of searching for my pants, we had three people looking. They were finally found in the oven.
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
The cards I get dealt on tinder now are karma for fucking a married man while I was in high school.
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