he put his p in my v, then his p in my a, and then tried to put the p in my m? first, double dipping is rude. second, i'm glad he finished shortly after that, i'm afraid of where he'd try to stick it next. my ear?
honey bunches of taint.
Paddidles count extra in the back of a cop car
we're tailgating intramural basketball with hard drugs and tequila...and i think the players are taking shrooms
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
we had a ceremony where you passed your fake id onto me in the middle of the bar. i was on my knees and you presented it to me. i don't think the bartenders were suspicious though
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
I think your dad took our porno
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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