Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
just smash crush and snort whatever we can get our paws on
I knew I fell for you for a reason
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
You passed out in my bathroom last night. I put a towel over your face so I could shit without it being gay
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
She's so nice... She deserves all the dicks.
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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