I never noticed this but I have a beauty mark on my labia minora
Please tell me how you discovered this.
I was looking in the mirror snooping around
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
Stealing vibrators from Walmart together was when I realized you'd be my Maid of Honor.
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
... I went down on him at the movies. I feel like Alanis Morisette.
No, I've only ever seen his brother's dick. So when I have lucid sex dreams, I just do a little cut and paste in my mind and stick his bro's package onto him.
Just got a message from a drag queen on okcupid. I cant even catfish successfully.
He's easy on the eyes, light on his feet, and rough in bed...what more could a girl ask for in a rebound?
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
PokemonGo as navigation to get some at 5:13 AM. Life choices, yo.
I hate csi yet I find myself watching a full marathon. I am also eating hotdog buns stuffed with barbecue chips and they are quite tasty
Randomize
