she looked like the before picture.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I just masturbated mid-day, thinking of you
I think that is one of the most romantic things I have ever heard from a fuck buddy on v-day, there is a strong possibility that you will soon be my girlfriend.
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
They're like penises that have been put in a blender.
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
I guess, just don't make it awkward
MY FUCK BUDDY'S MOTHER FRIEND REQUESTED ME! IT'S ALREADY AWKWARD COREY
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Oh man, are we repeating last 4th of July?!
That shouldn't even be a question, it's a tradition now. Hope your manhood is ready.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
