We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
i'm not sure what happened last night.. i do remember the police calling me to find out where i was because apparently at some point i went missing? don't worry though. they found me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
So he noticed that I cut a half inch off of my hair. Guess who just earned himself some road head on the way to the twin cities?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
You yell at me for giving you beer but not for licking spilled beer off your chest.
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
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