My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
Your maid of honor is passed out in a golf cart on the 18th hole.
come back what if one of your parents walks in and im just sitting here eating a cheesesteak without you
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
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