I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
She kept saying 'I love you' but i couldn't tell if she was talking to me or to her beer.
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
Yeah, clearly. And then we can float around my room on Christmas themed inner tubes. And drink, I guess.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
We helped him hit the bowl to the point that he didn't even have to move
I just pulled back the shower curtain to reveal Cinnamon Toast Crunch and a spoon in the bathtub. Ambien is a hell of a drug.
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
Randomize
