It looked like if robin williams had a vagina
I hope mine doesn't look like that
you'd be confused too if you woke up to pictures of a ghostbuster doing body shots off you.
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
Ok. Also I almost just threw up. Seriously. I was think to myself "really? Here? Now? At my work desk?" and then it went away.
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
She compares her life to Teen Mom. She's 28.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
Is biking from my house to 6th street for liquor pitchers a good idea or a bad idea
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
So the pizza place just called me after an hour saying they don't have dough
I can see their wedding vows now: 'Til basicness do us part
I tried to cut you?! I'm sorry! PS where's my hair?
I may forget my underwear, but you can count on me for drugs and plan b
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