Banned from zoo.
Again?
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
If you wake up soonish don't worry. I took your dog to burger king and now we're going to see some nice girls.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
There's a naked man in my car right now.
Look, I'm just saying, she looks like a troll and works indefinitely at a shitty Chinese restaurant, so me sleeping with her boyfriend is the least of her troubles...
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
You passed out in your dogs bed and you only willingly woke up because I told there was a bottle of vodka and a snickers bar waiting for you upstairs
It makes me so happy that my local liquor store has a black lab that is there every day. Really tho - it makes the higher prices excusable.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
If I die bedazzle my coffin please.
I've been eaten out in coupes, sedans, trucks, suv's, you name it. If I can do it in a smart car, you can do it in a vw beetle.
I knew you were the expert on doing it in public. You need to get paid for your advise
Randomize
