therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
I'm sorry for what I said earlier...your vagina wouldn't look funny If you had a kid.
Eating doritas dunked in queso con salas. Salllas. Salska. Salsa. Got it. Shhiitt. Salsa con queso. That's better. I'm hot pink socks.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Your brother came in a girls mouth for the first time last night... Ah the tales told whilst buying minors beer.
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
I need Mexican food. Like, I'd take it through a needle at this point. It's totally worth the track marks.
My fucking earlobe is bruised what the hell
I mean you can one up her. Instead of ruining friendships you can ruin marriages.
I want to eat a stick of butter
Did your pain meds kick in?
It tastes nice
Um so I might have accidentally on accident maybe blew up the bottom half of your truck...
Randomize
