Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
so would me posting the photos of the cock and coin jar incident be completely out of the question?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After he told me that it's up to him to carry on his family name, I almost felt bad for not letting him cum inside me.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
What an age we live in that I can try to pick up a guy by using my phone while I'm taking a shit at work.
Seriously I just dipped a banana in vodka I really need to stop drinking
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You will go out on a boat of flames filled with honor, sarcasm, and assholery, let me assure you.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
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