first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
there was a trapeze. enough said
im getting a BJ in a closet
and a penguin just handed me a bong
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
She volunteers at a homeless shelter. You volunteered to drink 7 day expired milk for $3. No chance. Give up.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
My head is just one big fuzz right now.. Its like someone replaced my brain with a teddy bear
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Pretty sure the guy at the Halloween party dressed as an ice cream man is working his way through the building without a care for gender or age. He high-fives me on his way out each morning.
It was ok until his mom walked in and asked if he turned on the crock-pot...
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
