hotel room ftw
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I'm watching this guy on intervention hospitalized for liver damage. He's drinking the hand sanitizer in the hospital room. Say hello to your future.
Why is the garage door in the middle of the street?
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
I don't know which part of you thought this was funny but it's fucked up to wake up in that much fluff and now we don't have a couch. Fuck you.
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
Nope. He totaled my car then moved back to Louisiana to work things out with baby mama. I sure know how to pick em
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
His beard looks like it smells like beer, cocaine and old pussy juice
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