It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Yeah the sex got weird after I said "who's your daddy?" and she actually moaned her dads name.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
He expects to fuck my tits but will ignore me in public.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Also not to brag but I got high last night and got us a host family in a chateau in the south of France
It's been 12 hours since I have heard from you and social media has given me no indication you are anything but dead, so that's what I'm going with.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
Jello shots? I thought you weren't drinking tonight.
Im not drinking im slurping
he said he only had one rule...that he'd only go down on me 3x a day. so far this is turning into the best relationship ever.
Randomize