I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
You rubbing siracha on a cat with your feet is the opposite of what I want.
Well my friend Jon slept on the couch and I slept next to my cooked lean pocket on the carpet
I'll be there with bells on. And by "bells" I mean "jäger bombs". And by "on" I mean "being poured down my gullet".
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
your penis is a great and majestic leader among the penises.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
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