What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
Dude I just ripped my new jeans climbing out the window so his booty call wouldn't realize I was home. Being his roommate should come with hazard pay
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Although now I have "number of cheese slices" as a unit of boob measurement in my head.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I am available for nakedness
Maverick's sitting in jail wearing a turkey costume and I am soooo jealous.
cant one of your roommates drive you?
You came in my eye once. You owe me.
ill be there in 20
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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