My cousin's wedding had personal beer funnels for each table and a drinking game against the bride and groom. im sorry for ever calling you white trash
Ended up passed out drunk in the neighbors lawn, still in costume. Neighbors thought I was a lawn decoration. Ten points for best Halloween ever.
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
I think i just got paid for sex with a hot pocket... and i accepted
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
It wasn't a wasted relationship. I got road-head in an Escalade. I still keep that with me.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
So my date night ended with us watching porn with his roommate.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
I hooked up with the sexiest couple in the LAX BATHROOM IN THE CHANGING FAMILY ROOM HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
