I have a running excel spreadsheet detailing the number of shots in a night and subsequent ability to masturbate
Just picture a bunch of Abraham Lincolns having an orgy.
That's not how these arrangements work. You don't buy each other stuff unless you break a sex toy. End of story.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
SIMBAAAA REMEBER WHO YOU ARE
when I went into his room, he was sleeping on his stomach, almost as if to silently say, "you're not touching my dick tonight".
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You flew out of the bedroom, stole two Solo cups from the beer pong table, put them on your feet, clicked your heels together three times
I'm gonna celebrate Valentines day by watching Bob Ross videos and tripping balls.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
At least you got some excitement going on, you got weed and might die tonight, I'm just sitting here bored as fuck.
Gonna try and have sex in the empire state bldg, will tell you how it goes
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
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