People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
Im so sleepy and hes snoring super loud! i just wanna suffocate him, sleep, and deal with the body when I wake up
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
Hooked up with my first aid and cpr teacher last night. She dressed as a lifeguard and brought me back to life. Beat that.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Thanks for not waking me up before the firefighters chopped down my door
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I used the hope and guess method to figure out who I slept with last night.
I FOUND THE LEGS
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
you took my virginity. you can't have my alcohol too.
Randomize