My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
Just passed an anti-circumcision dude with a sign. Handing-out-bibles guy has been officially one-upped.
For the record, a bath beer is far superior to a shower beer...
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
But seriously. What possible excuse could I come up with to ditch my parents on Christmas to go fuck him?
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
tonight...tonight im having sex in honor of you
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