Also, i'm pretty sure i've had my birth control pill stuck in my throat since like...two pm. So i'll be practicing safe oral sex tonight.
Wish you were here....
And I wish your mouth was around my cock, but that never happens, does it?
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
In case this wasn't clear when i said being his wingman was "hopeless", his date walked out on him when he poured a beer on his head trying to shotgun it
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I'm hungover and surrounded by children and Republicans. What did I do to deserve this?
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
Spencer just told me I got home and was opening beers with my teeth and trying to make pot butter
Randomize
