So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
I was trying to make tacos and friends but there was a major language barrier.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Dude are you alive? We drank shit that made a german bartender blow chunks.
No, this place just freaks me out. Like I feel like ill get pregnant just being here. And all those pregnant bellies. It's weird.
Went into Walmart to get a pregnancy test. Came out with a beta fish and chocolate.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
Randomize
