P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
you definitely made a grilled cheese using your iron..
ya and it worked didnt it??
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Remind me to never go to the bar with your Asian friends again. I need to be able to read or pronounce what I'm drinking.
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
The paramedics came back to shotgun beers with us.
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
Definitely broke my toe and messed up my knee walking back. Drink hitch hiking should never happen again.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
If sending nudes to tinder boy is considered functional then yes.
I dont need your sympathy!!!! Just a fifth of vodka and gummy bears...lots and lots of gummy bears to take my agression out on.
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
