If I don't come home tonight, I've died in a pile of gay.
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
i guess when we were done i grunted "unforgiveable" and walked out.
I felt kinda bad after screaming 'ITS MY BIRTHDAY TOO' while he was having a seizure in the front of the party bus.
he just used "boss" and "boner" in the same sentence. I cant respond.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
I think you might be the first man ever to describe getting a blowjob as "neat"
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
This guy wants me to put ice under his foreskin. What!?
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
