Do u think she knows her nickname is the oompa loompa
I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
I'm at work, still drunk. Can you turn on the radio? If the station goes off the air I passed out. Can't get fired. Haven't slept yet.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
have the fact that the early bird is danced upon by the prettiest strippers be your motivation
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
The married guy I've been fucking broke it off because I'm not a trump supporter and don't share his "traditional values".
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
Randomize