just watched paranormal activity stoned. laughed the whole time and screamed when they turned on the lights. eating doritos. I love my life
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize