Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
I come back home for break and my room is full of weed either my parents really love me or they are having more fun then I am in college
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
It might've been him telling me last night that he "doesn't even need beer goggles to fuck me." When I thought that was sweet, I realized something needed to change.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
She asked how many sexual partners I'd had and I was like "Honestly I don't even know". And then she said "well last time you said 8." And my inner monologue busted out laughing and I was like "Oh I'd say like 11 or 12.....plus 20."
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
We banged in his car behind the burrito place. Google Maps keeps asking me to rate my visit. 5/5, would cum again.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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