I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
i think the sales of Rosetta Stone are directly related to the size of that woman's tit's
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
So I can officially say that someone has licked whipped cream off my nipples. Go senior year
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I'm drunk filing my taxes in a bar on a Monday afternoon in a Regular Show onesie. I think I'm starting to get the hang of this whole adult thing.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
He had a tattoo of a crown above his penis. He was AMAZING! It was well deserved. LONG LIVE THE KING!
Randomize
