Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You said you'd make me a thank you card for taking care of your drunk ass. I'll be expecting that monday.
I feel like getting drunk at the airport is sort of a rite of passage into adulthood, but maybe i should reserve that occasion for a flight thats not just 1 hr
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
He ate me out while watching Fifty Shades of Grey---needless to say I'm locking this down
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
I got here. Mom yelled "drink of the day is blueberry sangria" and next thing I knew I was on a slip and slide.
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