you traded sex for a burrito?
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
Care to explain to me why theres a baby food jar filled with semen in my fridge? or why its labeled as unicorn sweat?
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
no one should ever give us hovercrafts
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
you don't even have a vagina so you don't get to tell me what to put in mine
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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