well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
I don't care what we do tonight, as long as it makes me forget that my boyfriend just told me he likes taking it up the ass from big guys dressed as construction workers
The amount I want to die right now is not proportionate to the level of fun I had last night. Not fair.
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Yea. It was an issue. Great time though. Apparently I went through the coat check, put my coat on and forgot I had it so I tried to go through again and just didn't understand why thy weren't helping me. Dave coat checked his pants.
While you wait, fill out your state patrol application. Not trying to be your mom, I just really want to fuck a cop.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
Randomize
