we were naked in his bed and he told me all about what a "baller" alexander the great was.
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I smell like I just crawled out of a bottle of champagne and landed on the floor of taco bueno.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
She said she forgot something.. and when she came out she was carrying a garden gnome, and a bottle of vodka. she was too hot to question it.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
so.. he paid for my flight to vegas, took me to shows, bought my drinks and STILL rescued my drunk ass after i ditched him. i HAD to cuddle with him this morning.. fair exchange, right?!
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
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