I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
Oh god. It's my first day here, I'm still drunk and somebody just drifted in a forklift. I'm going to die.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
I got used. This is the happiest day of my life. I was just a huge cock and that is all she needed.
Sorry I never showed up last night. It was between spending time with you and our freinds or having violent multiple orgasims. I chose the low road.
Whoever roofied me last night owes me a new pair of white jeans
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
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