i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
When you turn your data bak on you're gonna get a pic of a nipple but it's not mine
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
BECAUSE THIS IS AMERICA AND DONUTS AND TITTIES AND ALCOHOL IS WHAT THIS COUNTRY WAS FOUNDED ON
i made the walk of shame wearing her booty shorts that said juicy on the back. i'm still counting it as a good night
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
Randomize