break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
God dammit, you have a cape and I don't even have a fucking jacket.
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
I just want to make out with him forever
pls come tAke this super bath no romo it's just. so nice.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
If my life today were a movie the subtitle would be: Revenge of the Beer Shits
holy f. i broke my toe giving him head. how does that even happen!?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
