I'm still with the girl from last night. remember to call me conrad and that i work for PETA
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
It was over as soon as he asked if he could name my vagina pancake.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
his daughter has his phone and goesss ohhh boobies and shows me a picture of my own tits...
if you guys find pieces of my teeth don't throw them out please
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Also, why does our bed smell like mayonnaise?
You wouldn't eat with utensils. You insisted on making your own spoon out of a bendy straw and staples while singing "I'm a survivor" by Destiny's Child.
Randomize