handjob tips. give me some.
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
My hanfda are one with the u niverse and I am cirretnly inhaling a couch
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
WHAT THE FUCK JASON, WHY IS THERE A FREE BLOW JOBS BY LISA SIGN IN MY FRONT LAWN WITH MY PHONE NUMBER ON IT?! PEOPLE ARE PULLING INTO MY DRIVEWAY!
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
Welp, I've officially cried in every Chipotle bathroom in the city. Correlation or causation?
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Randomize
