The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
I keep waking up with the nagging feeling I gave him half a hand job through his shorts.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
I might be a bit. I accidently started hot boxing the bathroom. I'm just gonna go with it.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
Maybe why that's why I'm perpetually single... I can't find a guy with bigger balls than mine.
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
